Sunday, June 24, 2012

NO LOOKING BACK

NO LOOKING BACK

I realized something phenomenal yesterday.
THE HOLY SPIRIT HAS LED ME TO A POINT OF NO LOOKING BACK.
if I can put what I am sensing into words,
IT IS THAT I HAVE PASSED THE POINT OF NO RETURN.
up unto this point I have had more days of fear and  weakness regarding going to China.
SLOWLY THE SPIRIT HAS BEEN HAVING HIS WAY IN ME
and on saturday I realized that I am having more days of courage and strength
AND MORE IMPORTANTLY, JOY
in going to China and serving Him.
AS MY HUSBAND AND I PROCLAIMED TOGETHER
"we are thankful that we are able to live out our destiny by
DEPENDING FULLY ON GOD TO BE A PART OF SOMETHING
bigger than ourselves".
TO MAKE MUCH OF GOD TO CHINESE STUDENTS.
there are still days that I know satan will make me feel that I cannot do this.
BUT AS I SOAK MYSELF IN HIS WORD
and remain listening to Him at His feet,
I KNOW THAT I WILL CONTINUE TO HAVE MORE DAYS OF VICTORY
than defeat.
THE SPIRIT HAS DONE SUCH A WORK IN ME THAT I AM EAGER TO GO
most days it is so hard to wait.
I HAVE A LONGING TO GO BACK TO CHINA!
the Lord often reminds me that He has things for me yet to do here
AND HE OBVIOUSLY HAS MORE EQUIPPING FOR ME.
He continues to encourage with Christian fellowship of our American and Chinese friends.
WHILE LEARNING THE LANGUAGE
and gradually scaling down our stuff.
HE ALSO HAS AFFORDED US THE TIME TO SHARE OF WHAT HE IS DOING IN CHINA,
and gifts us with time to spend with those we love and and also those we love and want to see
COME TO A SAVING KNOWLEDGE OF HIM!

GOD'S TIMING IS PERFECT IN EVERYTHING!




Monday, June 18, 2012

walking by the Spirit



Lately, my thoughts and focus have mainly been on living in the Spirit.  The scripture in Galatians 5:25, "If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit", resonates in me.
Being reminded each day that I have the Spirit of God living in me absolutely humbles me and amazes me time and time again!  I am totally in awe of God's love in many, many ways...although this truth is positively the most compelling. 


So I am asking God each day to equip me to walk by His Spirit.  Asking Him to give me spiritual eyesight, spiritual hearing, spiritually keen sensitivity to the Holy Spirit. I am waiting on Him and His perfect timing to speak in certain situations of relationships I treasure.  I am always asking Him for His strength in my "struggles in life".  I am totally depending on Him, to prepare me to JOYFULLY go to China
to impact those I will encounter, for Him!


I am also daily asking Him for the renewing and transforming of my mind.  Only by the Spirit working this in me can I break loose from the conformity of this world.  Offering myself as a living sacrifice to Him can only be done in the Spirit.  My mind is fallen, it has a bent - a mindset that is hostile to the Supremacy of God.  Not naturally seeing God as infinitely more praiseworthy than me.  My mind is not by nature a God-worshipping mind, it is by nature a self-worshipping mind.


So I have asked my God to ingrain in my soul and my mind the truth that I need to ask for daily renewing of the Holy Spirit.   That I will be radically dependent upon Him.  This is my only hope of desiring the Will of God.  My only hope of my life being worship to the glory of Christ!

Monday, June 4, 2012

Monday Moods (I'll second that!)


Today I am going to piggyback on my daughter's blog, The Marvelous Flight of Cara.  She inspired me today to be honest and real with what's going on inside of my heart and head today.


So ridiculously hard to get out of bed today.  Wasn't I just at work yesterday?  It sure feels like the weekend was just skipped over.  How can weekends go that FAST?  Really?


I too, am exhausted and sure you could guess that by just looking at me.  LOL
I too, am choosing to live the abundant life God is providing for me this side of Heaven.
I too, fall into that sinful trap of doubting the work of my King, and I know that I am mistakenly relying on my "untrusted", sinful emotions.
I want my daughter and son-in-law to have the marriage God purposes them to have and I am always going to be praying for that!  Just like I have for mine, all of these years.
I want them to also to not suffer, physically, every day of their life together.  Again, always praying for healing and relief AFTER God has had His way in them for His plan, while trusting Him. 
This week brings on a "yearly annual event" (yuck!) that I always dread.  Always relieved when it's done.
I have been listening to Matt Maher's "Empty and Beautiful" everyday, alot!  The words and peaceful music speak to my mind and to my heart so magnificently.
Relationships are work.  They take creativity, sensitivity, intensity, and vulnerability.  In healthy ones, the results are beautiful.
I like vanilla lattes...ALOT!
I struggle with being so separated from my daughter, son-in-law, son, daughter-in-law and granddaughter, especially before I relocate to China.
I also plan on being more creative, especially in my relationships.  Being more pro-active, more often, and listening more acutely to other's hearts.
I rejoice in the confidence that God is my victory, and that my God is alive and not dead!


Thank you daughter, for nudging me today!